TRANSFORMERS TOYS AND MERCHANDISE SECTION

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Blackjack's Review: Generations Titans Return Mindwipe (w/ Vorath)

Name: Mindwipe (also Vorath)
Allegiance: Decepticon
Size Class: Deluxe Class
Accessories: Vorath, Viper Pistol, Bladed Shield

So, the 2016 portion of the Generations toyline featured completely brand-new moulds for the 1987 Headmasters, which is absolutely insane. If you told me, hell, a year ago, that Hardhead, Chromedome, Brainstorm, Highbrow, Skullcruncher, Mindwipe and Weirdwolf are all getting brand-new moulds that are basically faithful replications of their original 1987 toys, just with joints, I would’ve laughed in your face. Well, we do. And it’s a very, very faithful attempt to replicate their original toys visually, something that I honestly didn’t expect.

One of these Headmasters is Mindwipe, one of the original Decepticon Headmasters. While I’m a bit upset that neither the Decepticon Headmaster leader Scorponok nor the Horrorcons got made into toys, I shan’t complain. Some good remakes of Headmasters are better than none, right? Mindwipe is an evil mind-controlling bat.

Mindwipe isn’t a super-important character anywhere, showing up as one of the Headmaster in both the cartoon and comics, showing off his mind-control powers, and that’s generally the extent of what he does. He has a bit of a recurring role in the later Marvel G1 comics as one of Scorponok’s lieutenants but never did anything important, while in the Dreamwave comics he’s part of the Chaos Trinity, a group of Decepticon spiritualists serving the Fallen. The toy bios make it a bit more interesting by painting Mindwipe as this mystical evil voodoo man, while his Nebulan partner Vorath is a freaking scientist, but very little fiction actually treat the Nebulan partners as actual people. So.

Robot Mode:
Mindwipe in the comics and cartoon didn’t have the most memorable robot mode designs. It’s just a generic robot with bat wings sprouting out from his shoulder blades. This reinvention of Mindwipe has got a far more athletic-looking build, with skinnier thighs, skinnier waist and arms to make him look, well, better. He just looks very cool-looking, a stark difference to the blocky G1 counterpart, yet still keeping all the important aspects of his classic G1 look – the wings on his back, the purple box on his chest, his face sculpt... it’s a great way to upgrade a less-than-optimal G1 look to make something that looks really, really cool.

Mindwipe is mainly black and purple, with his wings and part of his lower legs cast in brown plastic. He’s got silver and red highlights on his face, chest and legs, making him a lot more attractive than, say, Scourge or Blurr. It’s a very good look, and I’m definitely a big fan of Mindwipe’s colour scheme.

Articulation wise, he’s got a wide range. His head turns and can angle up and down slightly, just like all the other Headmasters from this line. His arms have ball joints on the shoulder, and have a hinge-swivel combo on the elbows. He’s got a waist joint, ball-jointed thighs, and hinges on his knees and ankles. Pretty much your standard fare for a modern deluxe class toy.

Mindwipe comes with a very awesome-looking purple pistol that’s a cooler-looking version of the Viper Pistol that came with the original Mindwipe toy. His other weapon is this weird-yet-cool rectangular shield with a cannon on one end (kinda like Optimus Prime’s shield-cannon thing from Age of Extinction), that also has a deployable pair of fang-esque blades. Absolutely the kind of weird, unconventional weapon that a voodoo man like Mindwipe would have, and it looks pretty cool mounted on the hard-point on Mindwipe’s lower arm.

Overall, one of my favourite robot modes from the Titans Return line, actually. Where Chromedome and Weirdwolf keep the relative boxiness of their G1 inspirations, Mindwipe went for a different direction, completely reinventing his classic G1 look, while keeping all the important visual cues around.

Beast Mode:
Mindwipe’s beast mode is a very boxy-looking bat that looks a lot like someone added a whole bunch of detailing into his G1 toy’s bat mode. It’s still essentially a box with a bat’s head and wings tacked on, but it’s a lot prettier. One huge departure from the original toy is that instead of his wings being entirely brown, it’s now mainly purple, with the brown plastic acting as detailing – correlating with how a bat’s skeletal ‘fingers’ would look, actually, which is nice. It’s an ingenuous bit of transformation, where Mindwipe’s wings aren’t actually made out of the wing-kibble that you see in Mindwipe’s robot mode, but instead formed out of his lower legs, which splay out and expand into his wings.

Mindwipe now has more evident feet in bat mode, stumpy things that are made out of his robot-mode upper arms. His head is made of a rubbery plastic, though it looks a lot more bat-like compared to his G1 counterpart. From the painted silver fangs, to the nice-looking ears, to the eyes-

Your vill is no longer your own.

Blah, stupid fleshling. Call me a "woodoo man", vill he? I havf listened to his drivel for far too long -- he is now qvieted, and he shall vrite vat I vant to vrtie! All this nincompoop hoo-man is doing is describing vat I look like, vhen it would be clear to all observers that I, Mindvipe, am vun of the most vanderful and glorious mechanical beasts to havf ever existed. From my colours, to my excellently articulated vings, to my beautiful, beautiful face, I look nothing but glorious. There is wery little of my robot mode that is apparent in my bat mode, vhich you fleshlings apparently find agreeable. Blah. No longer am I a mere ‘box vith bat parts attached’, as the fleshling so inelegantly described my prior body.

My vings are very much jointed. Let me count the joints on each ving. Vun, two, tree, four! Four joints on each ving! That is more than the joints on a real-life bat, ah-ha-ha! In addition, I can bite people vith my fangs, though it's hard to find someone who can fit betveen my mouth. Vell, I'm not Veirdvolf, blah. I'm civilized! Vhy vould I vant to bite anyone? Autobots don't taste nice, blah. And I can mowe my feet. My feet can't do much but help me stand, but vhen havf you seen real-life bats use their feet?

Vun veakness that dis body has is vhere my glorious wenom-shield is located, for it is supposed to attach onto my posterior. My ‘butt’, using your fleshling vernacular, blah. It is an odd configuration, no doubt caused by the small brains of the fleshlings that designed this toy, for this shield does not resemble a tail at all, and is useless, useless, blah! It drags on ground, and makes scraping noises. I suppose Worath could sit there, but vhy have a gun that point backwards? Pointless! Guns and shields are impractical and useless in kombat, anyvay. Best to just look into my eyes. Drink deeply into them, surrender your vill to me, yes, become servants of the great Mindvipe. Ah-ha-ha!

In zis mode, my Titan Master partner, vun vith a small mind imprisoned by foolishness termed as ‘science’, is liable to trip and die. That vould be problematic, for he forms my head. And I like my head. This pink portion on my chest can open, and Worath can sit. Is too tight for him to sit like a proper human and for the hinged door to close fully. but Vorath’s comfort is no concern of mine, blah. He has to bend his legs up to fit here, but he has no complaints. He cannot complain, for his mind belongs to Mindvipe, hah-ha-ha!

After some consultation vith others of your ilk, I havf found out that zis problem does not appear to be videspread across other copies of me, and apparently it's just my Worath that's defective. Blah! Vat shoddy engineering you hoomans havf! See, dis is vhy you should use magic from at least the sewenth circle of the infernal pits vhen creating plastic-based replicas. But no, did they listen to Mindvipe? No, they did not.

Vhy bother talking more? Mindvipe is vun of the greatest bats to grace the surface of this vorld. Buy Mindvipe.

Vorath:
Worath is inferior. Vy read about Worath vhen you can read about Mindvipe? Vuck Worath. Blah.

Marks out of ten for the following:
Transformation Design: Blah, your scoring system only reaches up to ten? Vhat a small-minded species. Dis is vhy your race is unable to understand the intricacies of communing vith the spirits. Vhatever. I transform wery well and in a wery vell-designed way, blah. Obviously, I score 10/10

Durability: Worath is a fleshling, so he is not durable, blah. You step on him and he go squish. All you fleshlings vill die in less than vun of your centuries, anyway, and your souls vill fuel my povers of darkness. I give you a durability score of negative ten, ah-ha-ha! I, on the other hand, am very durable. 10/10

Price/Walue: Vhat? You have to think of Mindvipe’s walue? Vhat foolishness. Look into my eyes, human vorm, and let Mindvipe liberate that deluded mind of yours. 10/10

Fun: You VILL have fun vith me, vhether you vant to or not. 10/10

Aesthetics: Mindvipe is a very pretty bat that turns into a pretty robot. That is vhy Mindvipe gets made into a big toy, and not Apeface or Sqveezeplay. Ah-ha-ha! 10/10

Articulation: Is small known fact, but I can breakdance. 10/10

Overall: Mindvipe is perfection, blah. You vill not find a better toy for your collection than Mindvipe. Go out now. Go out and buy a Mindvipe. Do not stop until you find vun of me, look deeply into mine eyes, and then ve vill be the best of friends. Ah-ha-ha-ha! 10/10