IT IS BACK! AWF MAYHEM Returns to the airwaves!

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IT IS BACK! AWF MAYHEM Returns to the airwaves!

Post by AWF Productions »

JFA Voiceover: Thanksgiving?it has long been a time of celebration?a time of family?a time of reflection and gratitude. Now, as the AWF launches into a new frontier, it is only fitting that we thank our fans for their patience?

A new road in the AWF begins tonight?one our owner and CEO promises will be exciting and rewarding for all those who participate. The new programming schedule will offer the PPV experience every other month, and a new Mayhem every other week. There will also be an extended house show schedule, that will be explained more as time goes on?simply put, if you haven?t witnessed the AWF before, now is the perfect time to tune in!

*The pyro ignites and the Lawrence Joel Veterans Memorial Coliseum in Winston Salem, NC, comes alive!*

Joey Styles: We are live?once again, from the SOLD out Lawrence Joel Veterans Memorial Coliseum in Winston Salem, NC. I am Joey Styles and with me as always is Reflector, a former AWF great?and this?is MAYHEM.

Flec: That?s right Styles, a new look?a new set?and a HUGE surprise?

Joey: That?s right?there will be a NEW AWF Champion. Viewfind of course, very upset, he was dethroned, but never defeated. He went on the AWF promotional tour over sears for almost all of last year, successfully defending his title across the globe. He will participate in an AWF World Title tournament, with his first round match tonight?a TOUGH draw, Vin Ghostal.

Flec: That?s right?Vinnie G. hard for me to see Homeslice getting past tonight!

Joey: All this and more?and now?to the back?

Ext: Car Parks outside the Lawrence Joel Veterans Arena?

A black stretch limo with the license plate BTU 1 pulls up in front of the entrance.

Joey: ?And? what have we here??
Flec: ?It?s called ?a car?, Styles??

The driver gets out and walks the length of the limousine, before opening one of the passenger doors. Out of it steps a man ? bearing a striking resemblance to Sean O?Con, but clad in a green suit, with a red afro wig and a large green hat.

Joey: ?Why is Sean O?Con here? And why is he dressed as a leprechaun??
Flec: ?I don?t care! I?m just happy he?s here!

The Green Heat marches confidently upto the entrance, but two burly security guards wordlessly step in front of him.

Guard 1: ?You?re not allowed in.?

The Brendinio Heat speaks in the least convincing Irish brogue since David Boreanaz's.

O?Con: ?Och. Why the jimminy cricket not? Is a man not ?llowed to watch a good old fashioned wressling card tese dayz??

The guard points to a ?Wanted? style poster up alongside the door ? mugshots of Summers and O?Con with the text ?Not Wanted ? Anywhere! Ever!?

O?Con: ?But tat?s not me, f?sure. To' ta resemblance is uncanny, nae. My name?s Shane O?Con ? and dat dere?s mah? er? cousin. Dat?s right, sonny ? I?m the Heat?s long lost cousin from? uhm? Ireland. County? Galways? ster? shire? to be precise. Glad t?make yer acquaintance. I?m here to apply fer one dem dere wressling contracts, like my cousin had wit yer.?

The guards look at each other and both grab an arm each of O?Con, dragging him away from the building.

Shrugging them off, O?Con throws his hat to the floor.

O?Con: ?Hey! Hey! Calm down wit it an? all! Tere?s no need fer such aggression. I?ll leave if yer don?t want me? this is oppression, mind. You?re worse than t?English, ya bastards. Mark my words ? this ain?t t?last you?ve heard of? whatever ah said mah name was.?

Turning melodramatically on his heel, O?Con marches back to the limo and jumps in, slamming the door behind him.

*Meanwhile across the parking lot a stretched Hummer Limo pulls up, with ?PIMP? on the license plate?Viewfind gets out escorted by 5 lovely ladies?and 1 well built, very manly one.

Flec: Is it just me?or has VF lowered his standards a bit with that one?

VF chuckles as he sees the commotion being made by Mr. O?Con. He then escorts his ladies in and cracks a smile as the manly lass gives him a nod.

Joey: Something familiar?

AWF World Title Tournament Qualifying Match:
OP2005 v Judge Death

We go back to our regularly scheduled AWF programming to see Sixy inside the AWF ring. The camera pans over a little closer to the ring area as we see her holding a microphone.

Sixy: ?The following match is scheduled for one fall, in a twenty minute time limit.?

?Welcome to my nightmare? by Alice Cooper blasts into the PA system and OP2005 comes out to a negative reaction from the crowd.

Sixy: ?Introducing first, from Glasgow, Scotland. He is ?The Highlander from Hell??.OP2005!!!?

OP2005 adjusts his mask before he makes his way down the entrance ramp. The fans continue to boo OP on his way into the ring.

Joey: ?Welcome back to AWF Mayhem. Right now, we will have a match between the AWF?s two strongest wrestlers.?
Flec: ?With OP, I get that point since he sure can be strong. However, I do not know what to say about his opponent.?
Joey: ?Whats with you Flec? I thought you know who Op?s opponent is.?
Flec: ?That is my POINT, Joey.?
Joey: ?I never asked you what your point was, Flec.?
Flec: ?uuuugggghhh??

OP enters the ring and goes to the corner. Once on the top, he poses some more for the audience. He makes his way down the corner and waits for his opponent. "Out Of The Silent Planet" by Iron Maiden suddenly hits the house speakers and Judge Death comes out to the ringside area to a mixed reaction. However, with a mixed reaction, Death gets more cheers rather than boos.

Sixy: ?And his opponent, currently residing Deadworld?near Glasgow. He is JUDGE DEATH!!!?

The eerie Judge Death makes his way down the rampway as we get some more comments from our announce team.

Joey: ?Well, here is Judge Death. From the introduction, it seems like he and OP might be next door neighbors.?
Flec: ?So your telling me that this guy here lives near Op?s house? Hmm, no wonder both of these guys are wearing weird helmets or masks. I think it ALL makes sense to me right now. No wonder these guys seem SO normal to me.?
Joey: ?Well, your sarcasm knows no bounds huh Flec??
Flec: ?Hmph.?

Judge Death makes his way up the ring steps and looks at Op who is inside the ring. Slowly, he lifts up his hand and points at Op. Inside the ring, Op2005 just stands there looking unfazed. Judge Death enters the ring and the music gets cut.

Joey: ?The match seems like its about to start.?

The bell rings and the match does start with both men meeting at the center of the ring. Both OP and JD lock up at the middle and its OP2005 who shoves JD down to the mat. While JD is getting up, OP2005 flexes his muscle at JD to taunt his opponent.

Flec: ?OOOOH! He got served!?

Judge Death shrugs it off and tells OP to do it again. This time, after the lock up between both men, it is JD who shoves OP to the mat. While OP is down, JD shows his ?guns? at OP.

Flec: ?Does this guy even HAVE muscles??
Joey: ?Don?t ask??

A bit irritated and embarrassed by Judge Death, OP2005 gets up and takes him down with a spear. While JD is down on the mat, OP starts to hammer away at his opponent with his right hand. He picks up Judge Death and whips him into the ropes. On JD?s way back, he slides behind OP. Before OP turns around, Judge Death delivers a back rake on his opponent. Judge Death is still up for the kill after the back rake and bounces off the other side of the ropes before he takes OP down with a running bulldog.

Joey: ?Judge Death delivers a bulldog on OP2005 and he goes down. JD goes for the pin 1?NO!?
Flec: ?I think even Judge Death should know this isn?t the era of pro-wrestling where the bulldog falls in the same category as the high risk finishers. Either that or he just recently watched ?exposed: secrets of pro wrestling? featuring the voice of salem the cat.?

Both men are on their feet and OP2005 charges at Judge Death. JD catches him with an armdrag and waits for OP to get up yet again. OP is up and JD is the one who charges at him this time. OP2005 catches JD in time with a powerslam that sends the skinny yet powerful wrestler to the mat. While Judge Death is trying to get up, OP runs over him and delivers a hard kick to the sternum. JD rolls onto the mat in pain after that move and OP laughs evilly for the kick he did to JD. OP lifts Judge Death and backs him into the corner. There, he uses his boot to choke Judge Death on the corner. The referee breaks it up after five counts and Judge Death falls on the floor flat.

Joey: ?Death might be?dead?but he sure can feel pain.?
Flec: ?I?m supposed you were expecting him to no-sell everything huh??
Joey: ?No I am n-?
Flec: ?ADMIT IT!?
Joey: ?Well I??
Flec: ?HAH! I knew it.?

Judge Death slowly gets up and OP2005 approaches him for something. But as OP grabs JD, Death catches him off-guard with an eye rake. OP shrieks in pain after being raked on the eye and turns around. Judge Death sneaks behind OP and delivers a back suplex to take him down. Judge Death goes over the fallen OP and he locks a headlock at the grounded opponent.

Joey: ?Judge Death is trying to knock the wind out of OP with that sleeper hold right now.?

JD keeps the headlock on while OP slowly rises to his feet. OP delivers a hard elbow to the mid-section of JD, but JD still keeps the hold on. Another elbow, and this time JD budges and lets go. OP delivers some hard chops to the chest of JD before he tries to whip him onto the ropes. However, Judge Death reverses the whip and sends OP bouncing off the ropes instead. On OP?s way back, Judge Death catches him and takes him down with a farewell face buster. OP is down and Judge Death bounces off the ropes to deliver a running fist drop to the face of OP.

Flec; ?OUCH! That was one mean mugshot that JD delivered to the face of OP.?

OP holds his face in pain while JD just looks coldly upon the fallen OP2005. Soon enough, Judge Death does some sort of karate stance as OP is slowly getting up.

Flec: ?Now what in the blue hell is he planning to do now??

Within seconds, OP falls down the mat yet again after Judge Death delivers the dream of mirrors kick on the back of OP?s head. He drags OP to a vertical base before he lifts OP2005 with only one hand.

Flec: ?HOLY BEJEBUS ON THE FLAMIN STICK! What the hell is making JD have so much strength to lift OP like that??
Joey: ?I dunno but whatever it is, its workin.?

Soon enough, he converts it into another flapjack that causes OP to bounce so impossibly high from the mat and onto the air. Judge Death catches OP in mid-air on his shoulders and sets him up for a tombstone piledriver. Soon enough, a loud thud is heard as JD delivers it.


OP falls down like a ton of bricks and JD pins him

Flec: ?1?2?3..its over folks. I was expecting more of a fight from OP, but happens even to the best of us sometimes in the wrestling business. But folks, by NO WAY am I saying OP is one of the best wrestlers we got.?
Joey: ?Either way, OP2005 showed his stuff here just like Judge Death did. However, he got the short hand of the stick tonight.?

JD?s music hits the speakers while the referee raises his hand.

Sixy: ?The winner of this match as a result of pinfall is JUDGE DEATH!!!?

*AWF goes to a commercial break as JD slowly rolls out of the ring and heads to the locker room area.*

AWF World Title Qualifying Match:
Wolfang vs Bandit

A Touch of Evil bursts over the PA as red smoke rises from the stage, floating slowly upwards to the rafters and causing those folks unfortunate enough to get front row tickets to die by asphyxiation.

Joey: And now we continue with our first proper match of the evening?
Flec: How would you know that? They might change the structure of the whole thing ahead of time. This could be the main event!
Joey: It?s got that new guy Bandit in it.
Flec: ?Okay, it?s not gonna be the main event, sure. Still doesn?t make it a cert for first.

Mighty drums and cymbals crash as a lightning bolt flashes out of the blue and gives the ramp a good zapping ? luckily, our cameramen wear rubber-soled boots. The resultant flames grow into a circle, from the middle of which rises Wolfang, who ignores his positive reaction in favour of glaring at the ring. The flames flicker and die as Wolfang steps into centre stage as more pyro ignites. The fans who aren?t already blind are now wearing sunglasses for protection.

Joey: Look at the concentration etched on ? why are you lying on the table?
Flec: (mumbles) Wake me up when the entrance is over? (snores)
Joey: I despise you, you rat-faced git.
Flec: (snores a bit more)

Wolfang clambers up onto the apron ? no faffing around with steps for him, oh no! ? and steps quickly through the ropes, his face (however much of it is visible) still poker-straight. He climbs up onto one of the turnbuckles, stares at the silent, bespectacled crowd for a moment, then makes a ?Come on!? gesture that awakens them from their stupor?with a vengeance. As he steps down, yet more pyro ignites; this time, it?s a pillar of fire spouting from each ring post, bursting to life with a deafening boom.

Flec: BAH! (starts)
Joey: Nice dreams, were they?
Flec: Stupid loud noises?

Speaking of which, the sounds of Judas Priest fade away?to be replaced by a mishmash of D12?s Revelation and about five dozen different pieces of Insane Clown Posse ?music?. It?s hard to describe how loud and confusing this is, so I won?t bother trying.


Bandit steps up onto the stage, hopping around and generally making a nuisance of himself. He?s quite a sight to behold; as tall as Andre the Giant, with a Steve Austin slaphead, Viscera contact lenses, Goldust facepaint?and he?s wearing Rikishi?s thong-thing.

Joey: Is there any sensible comment that can be made about that? ?Cause I can?t think of one.
Flec: Make me die now? (hits head on table, hard)

Bandit sprints down the ramp?well, I say ?sprint?, I mean ?very quick turkey waddle?. He slides under the bottom rope and into the ring. Wolfang appears to have lost some of his icy composure; he?s staring at Bandit with all the incredulity he can muster, which is a lot. Bandit looks like he?s going to do Kane?s arm-raising ?summon hellfire? taunt?but the changes his mind and does a Rhino chest-pound?then raises his arms in a 3-D gesture?and gives a Mick Foley thumbs-up.

Flec: Does that mean anything at all?

Bandit?s music ? if that?s the word ? fades away and the bell rings, signaling the start of the match. Before Wolfang can even take a step forward, Bandit falls down onto his front and starts doing press-ups.

Flec: You?re supposed to warm-up before you come out here, man.
Joey: I think he?s signaling for the RKO?
Flec: What, right away?

Wolfang blinks, and steps forward cautiously. As he nears, Bandit does indeed hop up and attempt an RKO ? which Wolfang counters by simply grabbing Bandit?s hair in mid-leap and forcing him back down to the canvas. The crowd laugh like this is the funniest thing they?ve seen in their lives which, sadly, for some of them it is.

Flec: Like a finisher this early on would ever work!
Joey: Actually, it?s just a signature move with Bandit.
Flec: Are you sure?
Joey: Wait, I?ll check?let?s see??Post your profiles here!??second page?ah.
Flec: What?
Joey: It?s both.
Flec: Both?
Joey: It?s a signature move and a finisher.
Flec: How hell?

Bandit, floored, snarls and flails about a bit for a moment or two before getting to his feet. He then flips off Wolfang with one hand and simultaneously raises the other for an nWo salute. Wolfang shakes his head in despair, before laying into the newcomer with some right hands, followed by a kick in the gut and the Wolfsbane. A close-up on Bandit?s face whilst he lies prone shows that he?s doing Undertaker?s eye-rolling thing?and the People?s Eyebrow. At least, he is shortly before Wolfang plants one foot on his face and twists it around sharply. Bandit rolls out of the ring in pain.

Joey: Well, at least he displays some ring knowledge; enough to know when to retreat?
Flec: But not enough to know how to apologize and lie low when he?s p***ing everyone else off.
Joey: You?re not supposed to mock our roster?s OOC selves!
Flec: There doesn?t seem to be much of a difference between the two sides with this guy.

With Bandit holding his general face region in an ?Oh, the pain!? sort of way, Wolfang bounces off the ropes, and does a spectacular Suicide Dive!

Joey: Oooh!

That fails to hit anything. Spectacularly.

Flec: Ha!

Well, actually, it hit something ? the safety barrier in front of the crowd. Wolfang lies stunned as a result. Perplexingly, Bandit steps up to the ?Fang?s head and stares around at the crowd, before pulling off one elbow pad?

Joey: Now he just has to be joking.
Flec: How much you wanna bet on that?

Alas for Joey, Bandit really is going for the People?s Elbow ? another of his signature-cum-finisher moves ? despite being outside the ring. He takes off at a mad dash to one side?and tumbles clean over the safety barrier with a hollow thud.

Flec: I?m actually starting to find this funny.
Joey: Can Wolfang capitalize? Well, actually, of course he will, but how?

Wolfang pulls himself up onto the barrier and, spreading his arms for balance, begins to step towards Bandit, steadily increasing in pace as he goes?Bandit, as you might have guessed, turns around just in time to see Wolfang pounce. He manages to yell something like ?Whatcha gonna do?SUCKAAAAH!? before the Merseyside Marauder takes him down with a Diving Spear!

Joey: Big risk move there!
Flec: I?d have preferred it if he missed again, frankly.

The referee ? wait, when did he show up?! ? has reached a ring-out count of 5, so Wolfang sensibly picks Bandit up and slings him back over the barrier. Bandit hits his head on the ring steps after tripping on a nasty patch of thin air. Wolfang seems to mutter ?Give me strength?? before pulling the imitating loon up by the hair and rolling him into the ring. Shaken, Bandit crawls rapidly away from the ?Fang as he enters the ring.

Flec: Chicken!
Joey: I?m usually to defend this sort of thing, but it?s very difficult in this case.

Wolfang smirks as Bandit backs up against the ropes ? only to look very much shocked as Bandit rebounds from the ropes and connects with a Big Boot!

Flec: Holy crap! I didn?t think he could do stuff like that!
Joey: He?s a big guy, so a Big Boot comes naturally?
Flec: No ? I mean I didn?t think he could actually hit something.
Joey: Indeed, it?s the first move he?s connected with so far this match ? and it may prove dangerous for Wolfang, as this one is also a signature move and a finisher!

The crowd is shocked into silence. Bandit celebrates by hopping up and down like Taka Michinoku and screaming ?I?m the Boogeyman?and I?m comin? to getcha!?.

Joey: Oh god, this man alone will damn us to lawsuit hell for eternity.

Bandit then heads out of the ring and looks under the skirting, before pulling out a garbage can. He yells ?Get the tables!?, and pulls out?a hockey stick.

Flec: Well, he?s close ? it is made of wood.
Joey: Do you reckon he knows this isn?t a hardcore match?

Evidently not, as the ref warns Bandit of his impending disqualification. Bandit responds by waving his hand in front of his face, then Guillotining the ref on the top rope. The charmer. He then throws the can into the ring, and slides back in with the hockey stick, somehow failing to notice that Wolfang is standing rather patiently in the far corner.

Joey: Evidently, calling a move your finisher and a signature move causes the move?s impact to be negated, like with a double negative?
Flec: Do you just say every thought that comes into your head or what?
Joey: I refuse to sink to your level and earn my pay by simply throwing insults at everyone in sight.
Flec: I call that ?easy money?.

Bandit looks around, sees Wolfang, and does that stupid Ultimate Warrior raise-the-roof thing, and utters another unforgettable line: ?If ya smelllll?then I AM THE GAME!?

Somewhere, someplace, Erik Summers glares daggers at a TV.

Somewhere in Connecticut, Hunter Hearst Helmsley does the same.

And somewhere on a throne of gold surrounded by paid beauties, Dwayne Johnson changes the channel.

Back in the ring, Bandit rears back with the hockey stick as Wolfang bursts out of his corner. The Merseyside Marauder ducks Bandit?s clumsy swing and hits the ropes ? Bandit turns around to get caught by a Grey Hunter spear as Wolfang rebounds!

Joey: Don?t count him out yet, folks!
Flec: I can wholeheartedly assure you that nobody did for the slightest nanosecond.

Checking the ref, Wolfang notes that the zebra-shirted man isn?t going to come around to soon, then picks up the trashcan that Bandit so thoughtfully placed in the ring. As Bandit uses the ropes to pull himself up, Wolfang sticks the can over Bandit?s head, trapping his arms for good measure. This causes him to drop the hockey stick, which ?Fang picks up, and goes totally mental with it. But in a good way. A good way that involves smacking the canned Bandit repeatedly with many an echoing clang. Bandit stumbles around in a daze, until Wolfang pulls back?and then breaks the stick over (what should be) Bandit?s head with an immensely powerful strike! Bandit keels over, and Wolfang tosses the hockey stick away?then turns around in shock as he notices the referee standing up again.

Flec: And he was doing so well?
Joey: True, Wolfang was dominant in a brawling environment ?
Flec: I meant the ref. He was doing so well by staying out of the way and not ruining everything.

The ref points at the prone Bandit, still wrapped up in the trashcan, and looks to call for a DQ, when Wolfang grabs his hand.

Joey: Don?t do anything rash, ?Fang!

Wolfang, oddly, doesn?t just punch the short guy?s lights out and be done with it. Instead, he speaks, clearly and calmly, and he says this: ?He put that can on himself.?

Flec: Oh, come on?

The ref looks inclined to side with Flec for a moment?but then pauses, and looks back at Bandit. He signals for the match to?continue. Wolfang nods in thanks. The crowd pop loudly.

Joey: It?s not honest, but?
Flec: But you?re not complaining because it?s one of your favourites doing it.
Joey: (squirms) Kinda, yeah.

The Merseyside Marauder pulls the trashcan off Bandit as a sign of good faith ? only for Bandit to snag him with a Drop Toe Hold, knocking the ?Fang to the floor!

Joey: Amazing! He doesn?t seem hurt at all!
Flec: Well, he?d have to have something going for him, or we wouldn?t have let him in?

Bandit quickly grabs Wolfang?s legs and pulls him into a sort-of Boston Crab, gleefully crying ?HOLLA IF YA HEAR ME!?.

Flec: Wait ? it?s the Walls of Jericho! Even I know that one!
Joey: I wouldn?t be so sure?
Flec: Why?
Joey: Well, Bandit is supposed to do the Walls of Jericho as a finisher, but he also has the Walls of Bandit, which is just a regular submission move, apparently.
Flec: So?how do we know which is which?
Joey: We don?t.
Flec: Not at all?
Joey: Nope.

Wolfang shakes his head at the ref?s querying, and abruptly powers out of the move.

Flec: How?d he manage that? Bandit?s built like a truck!
Joey: To be honest, nobody except Wolfang himself knows exactly how big he is?so he can be as huge as he wants or as small as he wants.
Flec: That smells of plot device to me.

Before Wolfang can fully get to his feet, Bandit has leaped forward again and applied the Masterlock! However, Wolfang simply snaps his head back and flattens Bandit?s nose before the ref can even ask if he wants to give up.

Joey: I can?t believe how quickly Wolfang escaped from that finisher!
Flec: There?s a reason why none of the smarks around here actually like Chris Masters, you know?

Wolfang is fully up to his feet now, but Bandit won?t give up! He locks the Merseyside Marauder in a Headlock, and goes to follow through into an Armbar?

Joey: Another finisher attempt!
Flec: THAT?is a finisher?
Joey: Er?yes.
Flec: Along with almost every move he?s tried this match?
Joey: Yeah.
Flec: ?I can?t think of anything suitably bad to say.

Wolfang slips his arm away, though, and Bandit falls on his backside. Undaunted, the newcomer gets up quickly ? only for the ?Fang to irish whip him into the corner and follow through with a crushing clothesline! Bandit staggers away from the turnbuckle as Wolfang heads up top?and Bandit conveniently turns around once at a nice distance to receive an Echo In The Dark! Wow, it?s almost as if we planned it, etc. Wolfang finally goes for a cover?

Joey: 1?2?3 ? it?s all over!
Flec: Aw, no more finishers!
Joey: Shut up, he might hear you?

Wolfang lets his arm be raised momentarily before he leaves the ring, a self-satisfied smirk on his face, whilst Bandit reels on the mat, mumbling something about being the Lord of Darkness and having a nice day.

*Cut to commercial*

*As the AWF comes back on the air, Mikal Ashoka is seen in the ring.

MA: Thank you for that warm, North Carolina reception!

*More jeers rain down on the much hated General Manager.*

MA: As you all know, we are well into our World Title tournament and we will have more great qualifying matches next week, including such AWF Superstars as Divebomb and the AWF IC Champion, Y3B Blaster!

*The crowd begins a chant of ?Bring Them Back*

MA: Now I know?I know that many of you are disappointed to learn that two fine AWF superstars will not be here tonight. We?ve already seen one of those idiots?I mean?splendid athletes make a futile attempt to get in here?clearly, he now knows who has the brains around here?don?t you Sean O?Con?

*A cheer begins in response to the mention of HBK?s name*

MA: As for the so-called Game, Erik Summers?he clearly has gained some intelligence, that or much like many of you, he was simply too drunk to even bother!

*Suddenly the crowd begins cheering as the manly lady escort of Viewfind appears making her way through the crowd and down to ringside.*

MA: You see?Mr. Reilly wants this place to go in a new direction?and that can?t happen with Degeneration NeXt or Better Than You, or Foo Man Choo or whateverthehell they are calling themselves is running about, mucking up the show!

*The lady is now in the ring?and the fans are going nuts.*

Flec: You figured it out yet Styles?

Joey: It can?t be!

Flec: You are really slow, you know that Sparky?

*The lady removes ?her? dirty blond wig, and reveals a full make-uped, hooker looking Erik Summers, clean shaven and smirking menacingly.

MA: You people?QUIET?I have something?to?say?

*As if sensing he was no longer alone, Ashoka begins to turn, as he does his face is met by a little Sweet Chin Music*


Flec: You seriously don?t know how? Because our security for this company consists of a bunch of drunk monkeys?

*With a glimmer in his eye, Summers scoops up the fallen GM and levels him back down again with a ?Game Over.? The crowd erupts as security storm the ring and Summers slides back out, climbs over the guard rail and breaks through the crowd, stopping once at the top level to give the guards and the fallen GM the BTU salute before dashing into the back.


Mr. Reilly is seen, clearly livid, walking past his office we see in giant, green spray paint, ?BTU and we always will be??

Mr. Reilly: This is ridiculous?they piss me off even more suspended than they did when they were walking around?

*Suddenly he sees Viewfind*

Mr. Reilly: YOU! You are responsible for this!

VF: Whatever dawg?you da one who done screwed the thing up taking my title!

Reilly: Well, you didn?t like that?you?ll hate this, tonight, your match against Vin Ghostal, it?s next?
VF: Like that just fine?

Reilly: You won?t?


The program returns with The Saga Continues already playing and Vin Ghostal just making his way to the ring after being announced.

Joey: A lot of confidence in the ring?

Flec: Wouldn?t you be confident?

*Backstage we see VF waiting to be announced, when suddenly?*

Flec: WHAT THE?!?

Joey: X! Xille?out of NO WHERE?smashing a chair into the back of Viewfind?s head! Now using the chair for a leg drop! Another chair shot! ANOTHER! SOMEONE STOP THIS!

Mr. Reilly leisurely strolls up, counting on his fingers?

Flec: What is Reilly counting?


Mr. Reilly: YOU?RE OUT!

*In the ring Ghostal begins jumping about like he?s just won the actual title, X is shown smirking in the back over the fallen VF, shaking hands with Mr. Reilly who has the mic.

Reilly: The winner?who will advance to the next round of the AWF World Title Tournament?Vin GHOSTAL!


Flec: No?maybe not, but he did provoke the boss!

Joey: I am sickened?we?ll be right back?DISGUSTING!


AWF Hardcore Championship Number One Contenders Fatal Four-way Match:
?The Mad Bomber? Bombshell Vs. The King Vs. Casus ?Crimson? Crevious Vs. The Great One

JS: Okay folks, I?d like to explain this?

The camera suddenly cuts backstage to show King, Bombshell, CCC and TGO brawling through the backstage area- specifically the area just behind the Archivetron entrance. CCC gets knocked down with a clothesline from The King as Bombshell body slams TGO on the concrete.

JS: My god? would you look at this! They haven?t even gotten into the ring, and they?re already fighting!

As King and Bombshell start at each other- veering slightly in the direction of the Archivetron curtains- TGO seems to be attempting to crawl outside having lost his bearings, and CCC is still trying to shake the cobwebs clear. As Bombshell gains the upper hand, King suddenly spin into him, grabs him around the sternum and spins again into a devastating belly-to-belly suplex, which ends with Bombshell?s left foot popping through the Archivetron curtains.

JS: They might actually make it to the ring for this match?

As King attempts an unsuccessful cover, Casus finds an empty coffee urn and runs toward his opponents with it. As Bombshell kicks out, King gets to his feet and turns around- straight into a flying coffee urn smash from CCC. The blow sends King tumbling backwards through the curtains and into the ring area, resulting in him rolling backwards down the ramp and landing on his stomach. As Crevious steps through the curtains- still brandishing the empty urn- the bell rings to signify the match has started.

JS: Alright folks? just to explain? the four men in this match?
F: Four competitors? we?re still waiting on the DNA analyses for three of these guys?
JS: Fine? the four guys in this match are competing for a number one contendership to the Hardcore Championship?
F: Coveted as it might be by weird sh*ts wearing weirder masks?

CCC smashes the urn into King?s back, just to make certain everyone knows he isn?t giving the King a break. As he then throws the urn towards the off-stage area to his left, the view shifts to Twin Tron to show Bombshell slamming The Great One around in the backstage area. As Casus walks towards the ring to explore the possible implements that may be under it, Bombshell smashes TGO into a wall and drops him on the concrete floor with a stiff belly-to-back suplex. Casus, meanwhile, has uncovered a ?No Entry? sign, a hockey stick, a pointed shield decorated with Old Glory, a glowing white Rubik?s cube, two trash cans, a bullwhip, a rake, a computer keyboard missing the M, R, D, U, E, F5 and Page Down keys, a magic 8 ball, a sock, a ladder, a police barricade and a water cooler. As Bombshell yanks everything off a nearby trestle table, Casus finally unearths what he appears to have been looking for: a barbed wire baseball bat.

JS: This isn?t going to go well?
F: I don?t know? I?ve usually enjoyed the matches more when somebody?s been busted up with that?

As The Mad Bomber pulls The Great One up and pulls him towards the vacated trestle table by his hair, Casus raises aloft the baseball bat to a mixed- but erring slightly towards positive- reaction.

JS: The bat is getting a pop?
F: Are we in Kentucky? That could explain it?

As Casus holds up the bat, the image on the camera brings the words ?By the power of Greyskull? to mind. But as he is about to bring the bat down onto the King, the California native puts a size fifteen right into his happy sack.

JS (squeaking slightly): Ow?.
F: If that?s what works, it?s best you use it?

Just as Flec finishes the sentence, the Twin Tron brings up the Bombshell/TGO fight to full-screen (with a little Casus/King picture in the lower right) as Bombshell chokeslams The Great One through the trestle table and a selection of snacks that where left underneath. The Great One is left covered in coleslaw, salad and lukewarm mini-pizzas as Bombshell seeks something with which to do further damage.

JS: My god? I think it?s a safe bet ?The Great One? isn?t going to win this match?
F: $50?
JS: I?ll take your money?
F: Match isn?t over yet?

King is now hammering Casus as he drags him up and then body slams him on the entrance ramp. King then collects the rake that Casus found under the ring and runs the spikes over Casus? midsection. The blood starts flowing from around CCC?s sternum.

JS: And the bloodshed has started?
F: About time too? I think people were wondering whether this was the worst DIY show ever or a wrestling match?

King throws the rake aside and drags Casus from the ramp into one of the off-stage areas before slamming him onto the ramp with a snake eyes. Casus lands with a thump on the concrete as King calls for a PPC.

JS: I think this may be slightly premature?
F: I actually am inclined to agree?

After putting tomato tulips over The Great One?s eyes, Bombshell can be seen saying ?This turkey is done? as he makes his way through the curtains. As the Twin Tron reverts to a single screen, we see King deliver a PPC onto the concrete to a huge pop. As he goes for the cover, however, Bombshell takes a running leap from the stage and hits a leg drop right across the neck of the Californian colossus.

JS: That?s gonna hurt?
F: Not as much as what Bombshell did to The so-called Great One?
JS: I?ll take that $50 now, by the way?
F: The hell you will?
JS: I said The Great One wasn?t going to win the match? the fact that he is now being carted out on a stretcher is a good indication I was right?

As Joey and Flec argue, Bombshell grabs a dumpster from the backstage area and hauls it out to the concrete. He empties a number of contents through the side door- including a kendo stick, a baseball bat, two pool cues and a television set, amongst other things - and sets about King again, as Casus ?Crimson? Crevious lives up to his name: lying on the cold stone floor caked in his own blood.

As Bombshell turns back to his opponents, King catches him with a big boot right between the eyes. Bombshell falls from the impact, but sits up again quickly- even as King grabs a kendo stick and breaks it across The Mad Bomber?s upper back. Bombshell merely looks around at the King, who just stares in disbelief at the advancing Maple Ridge manhunter.

JS: I don?t know if King?s scared? but I sure as hell would be if Bombshell was still coming at me after that?
F: Only because you have the comparative strength of a herniated chrysanthemum?
JS: Where did you get that?
F: Sorry? I think that was from a ?Spider-Man? comic? but it seems to fit?

As Bombshell and the King start tearing into each other again, Casus finally manages to drag himself upright. He grabs the closest thing to him- which happens to be the TV set- and wraps it around Bombshell?s cranium. Bombshell drops to the floor like a sawn redwood, as King stares in disbelief at the damage done by the Olympian. Casus wastes no time in taking a run at the Los Angeles leviathan. Casus tries to tackle King with a spear to the midsection. The move takes King off his feet, but fails to take him out of the running as he locks in a front chancery on CCC.

As the two struggle in their current predicament, Bombshell sits up again- still managing to look more attractive than the 10 o?clock news despite having a cut above his left eye. He pulls the debris of the television set off of himself and attempts to get up- hindered by the implements surrounding him. As King lets go of Casus in order to take another shot at the Mad Bomber, Casus spins back round and hits the Californian colossus with a baking sheet square in the nose. As Bombshell advances on Casus, he drags a fire extinguisher out from under the stage area and blasts Bombshell with it.

Bombshell seems merely enraged by this fact, as he continues to advance. Having run out of carbon, Casus now gets to his feet only to receive a boot to the midsection from the Mad Bomber. As Bombshell signals for the Atom Bomb, King suddenly clobbers him with a ?Stop? sign and throws him into the side of the dumpster- only for Casus to catch him with a small package!

JS: 1? 2? and oh my, Casus was so close to stealing this match right there?

Bombshell shakes out the cobwebs and charges again, only to trip over the remnants of the television set that downed him earlier and giving Casus the opportunity to clamp an armbar on him. The hold is broken in short order, however, by a Super Big Gulp full of what appears to be Gatorade being smacked into his skull. The King, now back in control of the bout, prepares to lock in the Lock & Load on Bombshell, only for Bombshell to spin and roll through to turn the move into a shortarm scissors. King is in quite obvious pain as he reaches for something- anything at all- he can use to break the hold.

As King rolls towards Bombshell, flailing with a cricket bat, Bombshell releases the hold to clutch his knee. King drags Bombshell to his feet and sets up for the Rampage, only for Bombshell to shift his weight and fall onto him for a cover. He manages to get a two before King gets a shoulder off the concrete.

JS: That?s twice in less than a minute we?ve nearly had a winner in this match?
F: But almost only counts with horseshoes and hand-grenades? somebody just win, please!
JS: You?re still paying me 50 bucks?
F: Frickingfrackingrasinfrassinwhaddasharafuran?

As Bombshell and King start to get to their feet, Casus charges with a double clothesline at the two. Both Bombshell and King have enough of their wits left about them to counterattack, and all three wind up in a heap with their arms draped across each other. The referees count down the three, and the bell rings. But there?s still no clue as to who actually won the match.

JS: Well? TGO didn?t win?
F: Would you be quite with that?
JS: But we?re not actually sure who did? wait a second? the referee is ruling the match to continue! Stay tuned, true believers? the AWF will be back after these announcements?

JS: And we?re back ladies and gentlemen? just seconds ago, the combatants managed to pull themselves together?
F: Or more accurately apart? that whole mass of limbs before the break was nasty?
JS: King is now down again after Casus drilled him with a spear? and now Casus and Bombshell are fighting on the stage?

Bombshell gets Casus with another boot to the midsection and throws him onto the dumpster with an Atom Bomb before collapsing to his knees. CCC slides down the other side of the dumpster, and King manages to throw one arm over him and finally manages to score the pin fall as Bombshell gets back upright. As the bell rings, the Mad Bomber looks around absolutely livid as ?Head Like A Hole? by Nine Inch Nails starts to play.

RA: ?Ladies and gentlemen? here is your winner? THE KING!?

F: What? Elvis lives again?
JS: No? but you still owe me $50?
F: Ah, hell? I?m going to the ATM?

King has his hand raised as the EMTs check CCC and Bombshell pushes over a pyro stand before storming backstage.


AWF World Title Qualifying Match:
StoneCold Skywarp v Sixswitch

Joey: Main event time?and what a match!

Flec: Yeah?two guys I hate, hopefully they kill each other!

Joey: I?m being told by our producer that we need to cut backstage?

*Backstage we hear shouting and see Sixswitch and StoneCold already talking serious trash to one another.*

Joey: Some bad blood already rising here?and Sixswitch having enough?throwing a punch! SCSW returns the favor and the two are now engaged in a pure brawl! Exchange hard punches now?SCSW and SS slugging it out backstage!

Flec: Reilly is back there?security is back there?these two are really tearing into each other.

Joey: Stone Cold taking a moment and driving SS into the wall! Reilly ordering him into the ring?big mistake?STUNNER! Reilly gets a Stunner from SCSW much to the delight of the crowd! SS meanwhile charging back in, using the moaning Reilly as a spring board for spinning heel kick that sends SCSW outside, through those doors?Mr. Reilly stirring, SS going after?continued fighting?


Reilly falls back down again as security continues to struggle to separate Stone Cold and Sixswitch!

Joey: That isn?t right! They didn?t even get a match!

Flec: They disrespected the boss, they got what they deserved!

Joey: How can you even say that?so much unfolding here tonight, folks we are out of time?we will see you in two weeks!
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Post by Shockmeister »

Originally posted by AWF Productions
Joey: And now we continue with our first proper match of the evening…
Woops. :(

But seriously - awesome show. Let's all pray that the pace can be kept up.

IC: Hey evverybody, look - I won, I won!

Judge Death appears to be jumping for joy like a five-year-old.

Nobody caress? Oh, ffine, whatevver...

OP - you tried, I will grant you thhat, but deep down you alwayss knew...thhat really, you wanted thhiss to happen. Your ssoul cried out ffor redemption - conssider it delivvered!

Ahh...truly, affter sso long, it iss good to tasste jussticce again. Now, which worm shhall be nexxt?

(edited for typos)
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Post by Karl Baller »

OOC: Good show. I was suprised I did any damage at all since I went against two former AWF World champs. Anxious to read the next product you all put forth.
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Post by Wolfang »

OOC: Fun! Awesome! Great show....
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Post by Galvatron91 »

Seriously...3 posts?

If no one posts anything, how are the writers supposed to do their jobs? If there is nothing to go off of, where is the incentive for the writers to work hard to produce quality shows? There's a reason why I gave up running the was because when I was able to get a show out, there was little response.

If people want the AWF, then show it...word of mouth, get people back in here...get some new blood...get some posts in here!
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Post by Shockmeister »

OOC: I'm gonna go repeatedly stab Igz until the dolt gets back here.

D-Ex may also suffer the same fate, for I am in a stabby mood today.

IC: Judge Death kicks his heels in an empty ring.

"Awffully quiet today..."

Abruptly, the lighting apparatus falls. On his head.


Since there's nothing better to do, the assembled crowd members decide to vault the safety barriers and swarm the dark judge, tearing and shredding and rending and raping until naught is left but his immortal soul...and then he is remade, and it happens again, and again, and again...

In the darkest pits of Hell, Death files a complaint.

"I ffeel thhat, ssomehow, my aimss are not being met withh thhiss consstant deluge off pain being infflicted on me."

The customer services demon checks his computer.

"Oh, here's the thing, mate; you've been given Ghost Rider's job description."

"Ah. Whhat?"

"That explains why we haven't seen Johnny in a while...he must be off punishing sinners or something."

"Thhe ffool! How can one ssuch ass he be relied on to adminisster jussticce? I will ssee to thhiss!"

We cut to the backstage area of some oft-forgotten indy fed, where a certain flame-skulled biker is returning to his locker-room, looking pleased with himself.

Out of the shadows lunges the decrepit hand of Death, who grabs the rider by the shoulder and pulls him away.

"I would like a word withh you, boy..."

Whack. Bonk. Smack-a-roonie. And so on.

A few moments later, Ghost Rider re-emerges from the shadows, straightens his jacket and walks away, whistling.

Judge Death falls out seconds afterwards, chains binding his limbs together, scorchmarks decorating his body.

"Not my besst plan yet, thhat one..."

OOC: No, I don't know what that was either...but it didn't feel right to do an entirely OOC post, and this was the best I could think of,
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Post by Extreme_Kup »

OOC: HOW DARE YOU STAB AT ME JD!!! *shakes fist* Got your PM...and I BETTER those free brownies....wheter you mentioned them or not ;) Good show! I'm glad that skinny turd got the win ;)


undisclosed location

The sun has set and we see a house that is set in some countryside area. We go inside the house and we see D-Extreme lying on the couch and snoring. On the floor, we see Ignavus outcold and a couple of bottles of coke spilled on the floor with him. Slowly, D-Ex's eyes open up and he notices something on TV

D-Ex: "Wuzzat?"

The TV shows the AWF show and D-Ex scratches his chin.

D-Ex: "Oh no..."

He kicks Igz on the ground.

D-Ex: "Dammit! We missed ANOTHER show! How come you dont remind us when we have to get a flight to the next show man?"

He looks at the still unconcious Ignavus, and shrugs.

D-Ex: "........"

He continues to look

D-Ex: "........:glance:......."

He looks again

D-Ex: "........:yawn:...."

He grunts and leans back on the couch.

D-Ex: "I give up..."

D-Ex and Igz, your AWF Tag Team Champs. You think you got what it takes to take The Serial Slackaz on? Then join the
AWF and show us what you got!
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Post by CloudStrifer »

OOC: I would post, but considering the number of people here it causes some problems. I mean I posted on the one before this one, but I guess no one was interested in a feud. I could go off on a rant with my Character but it would take me a day or so to come up with something.
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Post by Wolfang »

BANDIT? WHAT THE F*** DO YOU THINK YOU'RE PLAYING AT?!?! I ASKED FOR QUALITY OPPONENTS... AND I GET THIS PIECE OF TRASH? Congratulations Ashoka- you and Reilly have just declared open season on the AWF. I hope you rot. But only after I get to vent my frustration on you both....
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Post by Amarant Odinson »

OOC: Sorry I'm late. :D

We see a view of the Calgary skyline, with the sun just barely peeking out over the Rocky Mountains. The scene changes slightly to a location overlooking the city itself. There, we see a large red brick house. As they walk inside, a sign just right of the door reads : HART HOUSE.

The crew walk inside up to a small door that opens up, leading into a skinny staircase that proceeds further down into the basement. The people watching at home can faintly see the light coming from the haunting place. The camera reaches the bottom of the steps and we see a basement cover with thin wrestling mats, a single light hangs from the ceiling and off to the side, with one arm raised, leaning against one of the water pipes is a man.

The camera moves around to get a better look at this person and they see a man stareing at floor. In his other hand we see a sheet of paper with a list of names, those names are the participants named so far in the AWF World Heavyweight Title Tournament. The camera pans up to see the man looking at those names is none other than Amarant Odinson.

"So this is the thanks I get. After 3 years of busting my ass in that ring, this is what I get.

You see, many years ago, I came here. I came to Stu Hart's Dungeon to become a wrestler. And through the years that I spent down here in this basement, getting stretched every which way for hours on end, I learned a hell of a lot.

I learned that if you go out into that ring night after night and give it your best, that eventually, people will take notice. I learned that you must strive to be the very best at what you do because it's only then that people will realize just how good you are. I learned that if you work hard, bust your ass, pay your dues and persevere through it all, that one day those sacrifices that you've made will all be worth it in the end.

After that, I worked all over, I went to Japan, Mexico, Europe, the USA and all over Canada. I leanred more vaulable lessons as I went, but I never forgot what I learned here.

I came to the AWF and I started kicking some ass, paying my dues and showing these fans what wrestling was all about. For 4 solid months I was the best T.V. champion this company has ever seen then or since. I was one of the best damn I.C. Champions ever and the fans knew it.

I went out there night after night, just like I was taught. I busted my ass, just like i was taught and gave these fans a wrestling match that they would never forget....just like i was taught.

Time and time again, I've shown the world that no one is better then me. I am PERFECTION in this business. I am the measuring stick that all others compare themselves to. When the AWF was under attack from the likes of X-WCW, I was the only one to come to it's defence. The list of my victories and accomplishments are too long to name. The sacrifices that I've made are too many to mention and after all I've said and done in and out of that ring.......

I look at this list. And my name is not on it.

For some reason, the powers that be feel that I'm not deserving of a title shot. I'm not worthy to even fight for my chance at a World title shot. No matter what i say or do, it's never good enough for them. No matter how badly these fans what to see me in that ring, it appears that Mr. Reilly or Mr. Ashoka or whoever is running this show thinks that I'm not good enough for the AWF World title.

Either that or they're afraid that it'll be too easy for me to win this tournament. Because from the names on this list, I could certainly see why they would feel threatened by me. Every single one of these "enterainers" would be destroyed by a wrestler like me.

It's time for whoever is running the show to wake up and realize that i will no longer be held back. That nothing can stop me from taking that World title.

You can't deny the fans what they want to see and what they want is for The Best Damn Technical Wrestler to take his rightful place at the top of the fed. they want to see the Rabid Wolverine go out there and do what he does best. The fans want Amarant Odinson to make everyone of those guys hiding from me in that locker room TAP OUT.

What they want to see is ME going out there and showing the world everything that I learned in Japan, Mexico, all over the world. They want to see me kick some ass, The want to see me win that World title and they want to see me go out there into that ring show them the most important lesson that I was ever taught down here in this basement, in Stu Hart's Dungeon and this is that no one ....anytime, anywhere... will ever.....

In Canada, its a Tradition... in Mexico, its a Religion.... in Japan, its a Sport... in America.... Its a Joke.